The sun sat regally on its throne, bright and warm, pouring through his west window, touching his smiling face. It was nice dream that he realized as he pinched himself, wasn't. His mission was clear. The first thing that JC even thought about the next morning was scooting over to Halle's hotel room. That was his mission. His jaw was set, but what most mattered set was his mind. The way he figured it, he had plenty of time on his way over to think about what had transpired the night before, and what he was going to do to remedy it. He decided not to hold back with her anymore, he couldn't. Sure, he was more than subtle last night, and it had gotten him into some trouble, but where would he be now if he hadn't? He needed to be more open with her, no holding back any longer. He sighed. Maybe she would follow his example.

He needed to apologize to Halle, for angering her last night. it had been on his mind all night, haunting even his dreams. He hadn't meant to. He knew that he was out of line for pushing her into an answer. Frustration and anger had built inside of him, but what he had done was not the way to go about it. Anger was never the answer, only the problem. He shouldn't have yelled at her like that, surprising him, surprising her. All he was trying to do was get her to confide in him, to open up, to not hold back. He wanted Halle to trust him, with more than just Josh. Selfishly, he wanted her to trust him with her heart too. His destination was clear.

-*-*-*-

No smells of bacon, no aroma of eggs. For once, it was still, and all was silent. Halle's eyes were closed... but not for long. Oh no, that rap on the door didn't seem to be her imagination. Not when it rapped 5 times more. Halle groaned. Who is here at this God-forsaken hour? she thought, glancing at the clock. The blurry red numbers on the clock/radio read 9:53 AM, startling Halle. Had been so long since she had slept that late? It was the one luxury she couldn't afford and probably the only one she needed. It was hard to believe she had slept so long because she would have thought her body was programmed for 7:30, the time she got up, day in, day out, whether it was the weekday, when she had work, or the weekends, when she had errands. It was a strange kind of privelege... yes, things in here in Orlando were different. It must be the air.

Thoughts of guilt began to eat at her as she hurried to put her robe on. It wasn't as early as she originally thought, but she had been on the phone for a while the previous night. First making arrangements, and secondly with JC. The conversation on the phone the night before had been impersonal to say the least. How personal could the phone be? It was never meant to be. Halle had begun to think that she got her best and brightest ideas just minutes before she reiterated them. That was how she had gotten the 'N Sync idea, and that was how she had gotten this idea. She and Josh would stay in Orlando, and Chris and Joey, as a favor to her, would return Samantha and Jill safely back to New York where they were going anyway for vacation. She hadn't told the girls yet, but she was sparing herself more rather than waiting for their approval. She didn't need it, she knew. Tthey would be more than elated to spend a three hour plane ride with a two members of 'N Sync and the crew in first class. God, pray for their souls. But she wasn't talking about the girls and she wasn't talking about Chris or Joey. It was the crew she was worried about. Chris, Joey, and the girls? She didn't think there was a first aid kit for that.

She thought about yesterday, the memories imprinted in her mind like footsteps in the sand. Every single memory of JC, frames of a movie, ran it's course, never to be forgotten. He was right she saw, in the movie of her time with JC, what happened to us? She knew what happened; she had happened. She had been scared to love again. "If you're scared of love... don't, don't be afraid."

She found herself singing the words, almost reciting them, they were ingrained in her mind and the disc worn out. Halle knew that she had to stay, and that what JC had said was mostly right, if not all of it. Besides, she reasoned with herself, she and Josh both needed the vacation. They hadn't had one in a couple years. They were due for a nice, long one. Long overdue.

She quickly checked the other room and found the young boy to be sound asleep. He must have been exhausted by the events from the day before, she knew she was. She ran to the door, as they rapped on it again. She had rather a bad hadit of being ill-prepared, running around, Miss Busy, Busy, Busy. And once again, in her haste, she failed to check who was at the door. Instead, she cracked it open without hesitation. She expected it to be one of the girls anyway, asking about breakfast, it was a little late.

But she surprised as she opened the door, nothing could have prepared her for the sight that presented her. Deja vu, yesterday flashed into her head. Once again, she found JC in the doorway grinning from ear to ear at the shocked expression on her face. This day seemed full of repeats.

She gasped and began blushing immediately, realizing the state she must have been in. Her hair was a mess, matted and tangled from the previous night's sleep and she wore her robe, not even dressed yet. Her hands quickly went to her hair, to straighten it as best she could and tighten her robe, smoothing it out in some kind of panic.

"What are you doing here?" she gasped, shocked. "I mean - what brings you here? Especially at this hour?" She corrected herself. She had to be careful with what she said, especially since she thought JC was still angry with her. She didn't blame him for his anger. I'd still be angry at me. I am.

"I wanted to stop by and say hi, hang out with Josh for a little," he explained casually, disguising his own nervousness at being here. He knew he was going to have to apologize sooner or later. "I didn't know that you would still be sleeping," he said contritely.

"Come in," she said. She had hesitated, but just for a moment, and held the door open. He still grinned, obviously intrigued by Halle's disorientation. This was the woman who had her life figured out at age twenty-two, financially stable with benefits, emotionally strong, wonderfully talented... he could've gone on. But the fact that she didn't know what to do at the moment brought a smile to his face. He'd caused this confusion and for once, he was glad to see she had taken a breather.

"Brought these for you," he handed her the bouquet of pink carnations. "I couldn't find roses." It was only then when Halle noticed that he was carrying them They had been lost to her sight as she stared only at his face.

"Oh... thank you. They're beautiful," she blinked in awe a couple times, shocked at such a gesture. And she thought he was still mad at her. Halle should have expected that kind of action from JC, yet it still amazed her. It surprised Halle about how sweet and how genuinely nice he could be. "I'll put these in a vase. Have a seat," she told him, leaning in to smell the light, sweet fragrance emitted by the carnations.

And she remembered yesterday. It reminded her as she had bent over, just like this, and smelled the aroma of the roses JC had given her. Yesterday, he had to apologize for his words. They were probably part of his apology, she realized, but he shouldn't have done it. It was she who should apologize. JC was merely speaking his mind, telling her what he thought, telling her... the truth. For the most part, he was right. And she knew, deep down in her heart, that she couldn't lose JC, wouldn't. She told herself partially that it was because Josh would be heartbroken, but mostly, she knew, it was really her heart at stake.

She delicately placed the flowers in the glass vase where the two roses were already. The roses stood out from the carnations dramatically, two seperate entities from the rest of the masses. The roses... belonged together. Her heart cried out, but only she could hear it.

"I, um, have no food to offer you," Halle apologized. As in most Asian homes, it was customary to offer guests food, and plenty of it. She remembered as a child how her mother would quickly whip up a dish, even if the visitor was only staying for a few minutes. She would insist that the visitor stay for a meal, and they often did. Who could refuse such an appetizing offer? "If you go to the dining room, they have complementary breakfasts."

"Did you eat yet?" JC asked, knowing full well that she hadn't.

"I just woke up," Halle replied. She ran her fingers through her hair and shuddered. How could he possibly stand to look at her in such a state? And smile, nonetheless. But Halle knew that JC wasn't that shallow, and he was proving that to her. He was someone who tended to look beyond the surface into the deeper, more personal, aspect of people.

As she crossed the sitting area to check on Josh, JC smiled at her, "Then we'll all go after you finish getting ready, alright? I know Josh is sleeping, but I'll carry him." God, his smile was so addicting. It got under her skin, but not in a bad sense. Once it was there, it gave her chills, and she could never get enough of it. Every time he smiled, be it at her or at ten thousand fans, it warmed her heart like the sun peeking through the clouds on a gray day.

"Well, ok," Halle complied, as though she had a choice. His eyes did something to her. Her stomach was grumbling with hunger, and breakfast sounded like a great idea. "I guess I'll get ready. If Josh wakes up, can you just keep him busy until I can get him dressed?"

"No problem," JC dismissed, nodding at the same time. Hurrying to the bathroom to fix her appearance, Halle silently thanked God for giving her a second chance. This is what she needed, this was how she was going to apologize.

-*-*-*-

She couldn't believe her eyes. She had walked out of her room, freshly showered and changed. Josh was awake, and he and JC were both sitting on the couch. That aspect did not shock her, rather it was the fact that JC and Josh were dressed almost identically. An outsider would have to do a double-take and look very closely to realize that they were not, in fact, father and son. She had to.

JC and Josh were both wearing jeans, Josh in his Osk-Kosh B'Goshes. While JC wore a plain white T-shirt under a pillowy vest, Josh wore a plain short-sleeved shirt with his tiny Old Navy vest which his Aunt Kel had given to him for Christmas. They were smiling at her when she walked out, both waiting for her reaction with held breath. The outfits had been purposeful.

Her heart skipped a beat, but not entirely because it scared her. No, it was because her heart ached as she witnessed the scene before her. She longed for something like that, a complete family. She wanted someone who would love Josh and her completely. What hurt her the most, though, was the she knew that she would never be able to find that person, she had resigned herself to that. But it was not as though she had ever looked.

"He woke up, and I helped him get ready so that we could leave right away," JC explained. "Josh said he was hungry. I hope that's ok. How does he look?" he inquired, looking pointedly at her.

"Adorable, as usual," Halle answered lightly, walking over the soft carpet to Josh and ruffling his hair. "Now let's hurry. I'm starving."

JC nodded and they left the hotel room, the three of them, and headed to the elevator. JC and Josh messed around, like two typical boys, until JC finally won by picking up Josh and slinging him over his shoulder. Halle hadn't heard Josh squeal and laugh like that since... since the last time he was with JC.

"Come on, you two silly boys," Halle shook her head, laughing, and stepped into the elevator as the doors slid open.

JC in the meantime was tickling Josh's stomach as Josh squealed in his arms, but he stopped as soon as he saw there was another person in the elevator, though he didn't let Josh down. With a smile on his face, he walked into the elevator, not saying a word as he held Josh up on his shoulders. Josh was oblivious though, laughing and squirming on JC's shoulder. JC couldn't help but smile even wider. Meanwhile, the other woman stared them down.

Josh wouldn't stop squirming and laughing, flailing his little body in the air and JC held him tight so he wouldn't fall. However, his squirming and moving brought him a little too close too the other woman. She lunged out of the way as if she was about to be killed. She placed her hand on her chest dramatically.

"Sorry," said JC quickly, when he saw what had happened, and quickly removed Josh from his shoulders.

"Sorry," echoed Josh, looking up at the woman, still standing to the side with her hand to her chest.

"He didn't hit you, did he?" asked Halle with concern. "He didn't mean to."

"No, he didn't hit me," the woman said angrily. "But this behavior is unacceptable..."

"Ma'am, he's only a little boy, and we're sorry," tried JC once again, but the woman was unrelenting.

"Hmm! A grown man like you is swinging him around! It is as much your fault as it is his! You should know how to discipline your son! And you," she said, turning to Halle, "You should know how to discipline your husband!"

As if it had been programmed by fate, the elevator stopped and the doors slid open. The woman just as quickly huffed out, leaving Halle, JC and Josh to just stare at her retreating figure as the doors closed once again to take them to the dining room.

"Well..." started JC, turning to Halle.

"I'm just as much in shock," Halle said. "How rude! I mean, ok, maybe Josh came close to hitting her, but it was an honest mistake!"

"Mommy, Blue, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hit her." Josh was tugging on Halle's shirt.

JC reached down and scooped him up. "You didn't hit her, buddy."

"Then why was she acting that way?"

"She was just rude, honey," Halle soothed. "It wasn't your fault, or Blue's." Once again the elevator binged and the doors slid open. "Let's just go eat now," she said and they all headed to the dining room.

It was simple, they got a table for two and pulled up a chair on the side for Josh. The dining room was somewhat full, and two seater table were the only ones open. Quickly, they got their plates and went straight to the buffet table. It held a variety or fruits, vegetables, salad dressing and other light foods, including some soup and otehr breakfast foods. Halle was starving, and they went through the line quickly, both Halle and JC getting Josh's food, since he wasn't tall enough to reach the buffet table. Just as quickly, they went back to their seats. She was about to begin eating when she glanced up and was met by JC's stare.

"What?" she asked innocently, placing the fork down that had been halfway to her mouth, nervous.

"Josh," JC said tenderly to the little boy. "Would you like to say grace?"

Halle then understood the look she had recieved, but then wondered why JC was asking Josh to do it. She considered herself spiritual, believing in God and His power, but as for being religious, she was nowhere near that. She didn't have time to attend services on Sunday. The weekends were her time away from the office, and most of the time it was spent being with Josh, cleaning her home, or running errands. Josh most certainly didn't know anymore than she did, much less how to say grace. She hadn't raised him religious, she just didn't have the time.

"OK," Josh nodded his head enthusiatically, reaching for Halle and JC's hands. Then he bowed his head and squeezed his eyes shut. "Dear Justs, bless the food and Mommy and Blue. Amen."

"Where did you learn that, Josh?" Halle asked calmly, so as not to have the little boy think she was upset with him. She wasn't the least bit upset, but was just concerned with where he learned it. She was that it wasn't from Kel, who was like her, spiritual, but busy.

"Blue," Josh said, looking pointedly at the man sitting diagonally at the table from him. Josh then began to feed himself with the toast on his plate, oblivious to Halle and JC now staring at each other.

"Was I not supposed to do that?" JC asked guiltily, looking straight at Halle, waiting for her reaction.

"I was just wondering," she shrugged. "No big deal." There was going to be no argument today, she would have no part in it, just apologies. She was just waiting for the right time.

There was an awkward silence as everyone ate, you could hear the utensils moving about, other conversations, anything but theirs, for it was non-existent. Neither Halle nor JC knew what to say next, but both knew an apology was in order.

"JC - "

"Halle - "

They began speaking at the same time. Then they paused, allowing the other to go ahead of them. But they both again began to talk, starting the vicious cycle over.

"Go ahead," Halle allowed finally, catching onto the problem.

"No, you go," JC started. "Ladies first." Another problem was arising...

"Go," Halle said firmly, her eyes widening to emphasize her words. Even though Halle hadn't wanted to irritate him in any way, if one of them didn't put their foot down, this was going to go on forever and nothing would get done. Besides, she wanted to apologize as soon as she could after he said what he was going to.

JC didn't need to be told a third time. "I want to apologize for last night," he began.

"Well don't," she cut him off quickly when she realized what he was saying. "It wasn't your fault. You were right about a lot of what you said. I'm sorry for being rude about it. I never should have acted that way. I'm... I'm ashamed about it." It wasn't exactly the way she had ben planning her apology, but it would have to do.

"Don't ashamed. I should be ashamed. I'm still sorry for forcing an answer out of you," JC apologized. "My conduct was less than admirable. My mother would be ashamed of me."

Halle stared at him for a moment, then began giggling, no longer being able to keep a straight face. The situation seemed almost comical to her now. Here they were, each wondering when they should apologize to the other and thinking they were at fault. They were trying to solve an argument and in the process they were starting another one. It was too ironic that the one thing they wanted to fix was the one thing they disagreed over. Oh yes, Halle was sure there was not going to be a disagreement, and certainly not over whose fault it was yesterday. "What?" JC demanded, his face starting to warm. Was she laughing at him?

"You really are too gentlemanly," Halle shook her head, continuing to eat, beginning right where she had left off.

"Is that a good or bad thing?"

She stopped in thought for a moment, pausing with her fork just below her face. "It's a good thing," she answered, before smiling at him, remembering how kind he was to her, even when she didn't deserve.

Now, he smiled easily too. "That's what I thought, but the way you said it, I thought it might have been bad."

"No, it's a good thing," she said, resuming with her breakfast as she silently continued to smile.

"Mommy, do you like Blue?" Josh asked his mother, stopping his eating to ask his question.

Halle was only mildly surprised at the question. It was an innocent question, and she doubted that the little boy had any comprehension at all about love and what it really was, so answering the question wouldn't be too hard on her.

"Of course, Josh," Halle answered simply.

"Are you gonna marry him?" he pressed.

Two forks clattered to their plates making a loud 'clank', and JC and Halle both stared at Josh with their mouths open. A deep red flush creeped into Halle's face, and her cheeks began burning in embarassment as she stared at him with an open mouth. Meanwhile, at the other side of the table, JC was having a coughing fit.

What could Halle do? "Umm..." She knew there was not going to be anyone to save her this time. "No, honey, Mommy doesn't like JC that way, Josh," Halle said quickly as she tried to get herself out of the situation as fast as she possible and at the same time handing JC a glass of water. She had said the words, but nothing could make her believe them. She took a deep breath before turning to him. "Are you OK?" she asked, concern in her voice.

He graciously accepted the glass and gave a small nod as he consumed the cool liquid. Josh was awfully smart for a three year-old, but that thought was in the back of his mind at the moment. He was thinking about what Halle had just said.

No, Mommy doesn't like JC that way.

He had been right all along. So why was he still there? Those thoughts plagued him as he finished the rest of his meal in silence. A fiery debate raged in his mind. If she didn't love him, then was his endeavor worth his effort, his heartbreak, sure to follow? What did he expect anyway? She has never said she thought him more than a friend! It was just that...

"I still have to tell the girls about the change in plans," Halle began, breaking him away from his thoughts. They were about done the meal, Josh finishing up a few last bites of bacon. "I don't think it will be a good idea if you come with me to talk to them, but if you wouldn't mind taking Josh back to the hotel room and just playing with him for a little bit..."

"No problem," he answered quickly as he played with the tablecloth. He didn't want to look at her, afraid the hurt apparent in his blue eyes might betray him, but he spoke too quickly, maybe a little too quickly.

Her eyes narrowed. "Are you sure? Do you mind?" She thought it was her request that had made him edgy all of a sudden.

"Yeah, I'm sure. No problem." She wanted to believe him, but he was still looking down. She noticed that he was playing with the tablecloth.

"Are you alright?" she asked, as she watched him. He could feel her eyes on him and he knew he would have to look up. Put on a smile, Chasez. He put on his most convincing smile and looked up at her as if nothing had been wrong.

"Of course I'm alright. Why wouldn't I be?"

She looked at him hesitantly for a moment, but dismissed it. Maybe she was imagining things. "No reason. Anyway, thank you so much," she said gratefully, beginning to clear the table of their plates as Josh finished. "I owe you one."

"Consider this a free-bee," JC said lightly, removing Josh from the booster seat and placing him on the floor.

Halle looked up at him. "Thanks," she repeated, softly. He was too kind, too thoughtful. Payment for every kind deed he had ever done for Josh and her would never be adequate. But deep down inside she knew that payment wasn't what JC sought, but something more. Love, she hoped, but she knew that in reality she couldn't be that for him, not when she was this way. Why couldn't she let herself free? What was it that was keeping her back? Her heart wanted one thing, her mind another. Fears crept up. She was imprisoned. And there seemed to be nothing she could do about it, until she found out why.

But Halle was glad at the moment, for the close bond between the two Joshes. That meant she didn't have to talk on the elevator ride back to their floor; all she had to do was watch, a spectator. The two boys did all the talking. It was a surprising time and once again when her Josh spoke with the maturity beyond his age. He was always a smart child, but for one that was almost four, his vocabulary astounded her. She smiled lovingly at the two of them, the picture they made. She didn't have to say a word, nothing was needed.

As the elevators doors opened and they walked down the hall, Halle opened the door to her room and stood by it, making sure no one was in the hall, or rather, Samantha and Jill. She didn't want them to know JC was here, or she would have two crazed fans on her hand. With all the screaming she knew they would be doing, it wouldn't be pretty and she didn't feel like putting up with the disturbance it would cause. Halle waited until JC and Josh were safely in the hotel room before knocking on the girls' door. She waited for a full five minutes, before a sleepy Samantha answered the door.

"Oh, Ms. Lin. Hi," she mumbled, looking like she just fell out of bed, her blond hair unkempt and her eyes only halfway open. "Is it time to leave already?" she asked groggily.

"No, actually, not yet," Halle answered, "But there has been some change in plans, and I needed to tell you about it before you two leave."

"Is something wrong?" Samantha asked, letting Halle into the room. One wouldn't think they'd have had time to really live in it, but you wouldn't know from the mess of the room. Scattered around were various articles of clothing, mostly shoes and many, many posters of 'N Sync, the majority being of Justin and JC. Halle was sure she didn't wnat to know what they had been up to.

"No, not at all," Halle smiled at Samantha, trying not to let on her disgust of the room. "I think you'll like the change, actually. Get Jill up, I need to tell both of you," said Halle, spying her sleeping figure.

"Alright, hold on." Samantha walked over to the bed and tapped Jill lightly.

No response.

She did it again, this time with more force.

No response.

She did it once more, this time almost rolling her over.

No response.

Halle could already tell that Samantha was getting frustrated. Jill did not seem to want to wake up. Suddenly, a smile crept up on Samantha's face. Beside her was a glass of water. She reached for it and as soon as she had grasp of it, threw it directly on Jill's sleeping face.

Jill awoke with a start. "What?! What?!" she called, in shock from being dashed out of sleep. Her eyes were wide as she stared unfocused at the sene that lay in front of her. "Where's the fire?!"

Samantha was laughing hard, Jill didn't look like she knew where she was. But as soon as Jill saw Samantha, she narrowed her eyes. "Samantha!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. Even Halle had to cover her ears. That girl had one set of lungs. Of course, they must have hefty lungs to keep screaming for 'N Sync the way they do. Quickly, Halle came forward to stop the imminent scene.

"Girls," she said, walking up quckly.

"What?" Jill called, sitting up on the bed and rubbing her eyes, the look of murder disappearing. Samantha was still laughing a bit too hard to answer her, but she looked at Halle, so she knew she had her attention.

"Good morning Jill, there's been a change of plans."

"Change of plans?" Jill asked. Samantha had calm down significantly and was now sitting on the bed with Jill.

"I have decided that Josh and I will stay in Orlando for a much-needed vacation," she began.

"What about Samantha and me?" Jill cried before Halle had any chance to finish, a look of worry appearing on her face.

"I was just getting to that," said Halle patiently.

"Yeah, Jill," Samantha shot her a look. "Geez."

Halle ignored that comment and began again, with slightly different information. "You two will be returning to New York, but without Joshua and myself."

"Aw man!" Jill exclaimed, once again interrupting her.

"But our parents are gonna get pissed when they see that we're not with you," Samantha frowned. "We don't have a chaperone now!"

"You will have chaperones, although I can't guarantee that they'll be responsible," Halle laughed, thinking about the cake fight that Chris had started back in New York. And he was the oldest one, too.

"Who?" Jill asked skeptically, staring at Halle pointedly, waiting for an answer.

"Well, I've made arrangements so that Chris and Joey will fly you up to New

York," Halle held her breath and braced herself for the oncoming screams.

"Chris and Joey who?" Jill demanded. "Is this a joke?"

"Uh, Chris Kirkpatrick and Joey Fatone," Halle had to think hard to recall their names. She simply knew the two as Chris and Joey. "At least, that what I thought their names were when I talked to them last night."

The two girls started screaming, jumping on the bed and hugging themselves. "Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!" Halle covered her ears in order to mute the sound a little. They were oblivious to anything else as their screams of joy ran through the air. And I was hoping I'd avoid the disturbance by not letting them see JC. Halle should have just kept it a surprise. Then she wouldn't have to deal with their screaming and her ears could once again be safe.

"It's not JC and Justin, but who cares?" Samantha screamed. "Can you see their faces when we land?"

"Will they walk out with us?"

"Are they gonna stay in New York?"

"Oh my Goooooooooooooood!"

"GIRLS!" Halle had to shout herself to be heard over them. The bed was rumpled beyond belief, almost identical to the rest of the room. Jill and Samantha turned, suddenly remembering that Halle was in the room with them.

"Thank you so much, Ms. Lin," both girls jumped off the bed and threw themselves at her, giving her the tightest hug she had ever gotten.

"Ok, don't cut off my air supply before you leave, or the deal's off..." She had never witnessed people so quickly let go as Samantha and Jill did at that moment. She had to laugh. "Okay, you're very much welcome," she smiled. "But listen to me. Behave. Please. Don't make it hard on the guys, and don't make it hard on yourselves, ok? Promise me that."

"We promise, Ms. Lin," they both answered simultaneously, smiling, as if they were two angels. Your haloes are crooked. That scared Halle, but she knew that Chris and Joey were big boys and could handle these two. If not, Halle knew that Chris' girlfriend could handle them. She seemed to have knocked some sense into Chris himself, Halle smiled.

"Good. Now your flight leaves at three, so they'll be here around one thirty to pick you up," Halle went on. "Make sure all your stuff is packed and ready to go when they get here. We don't want you to miss your flight."

"Are they staying in New York?" Samantha asked. "Maybe we could show them around."

"I have no idea if they're staying or whatnot, but you can ask them," Halle replied. She knew that Joey and Chris wouldn't be staying, at least not where the girls would be anyway. She didn't want to burst the girls' bubble, but she didn't think they would tell them where they were staying, but that was their affair. She'd be in Orlando, far away. "I better go back to Josh, now. If you two want some food, I think they're still serving breakfast in the dining room."

"Thank you so much, again, Ms. Lin for everything you've done for us," Samantha said sincerely.

"Yes, thank you," Jill echoed. "It was great meeting you, and tell Josh we said 'bye, please?"

"I will, and it was nice meeting the both of you as well," Halle nodded as each of them gave her a hug. "I hope you both had a great time." With that, she headed for the door.

She let out a sigh of relief once she was out of that room. Utter craziness. Pure chaos. Take your pick. That was what was in that room. She was glad to be out of it. Now if she only knew what to do about JC...

She unlocked the door to the room, quietly walking in. JC and Josh were situated on the floor, playing with action figures. She stood back and watched as they played. No, it wasn't just mere interaction between the two; JC was actually giving voices to each of the action figures. She was amused by the childish display, but nevertheless it warmed her heart.

But even then it went deeper than that. Somehow, by just the way that they played with one another, worked together, interacted, Halle could tell that there was a deep caring between them. He's gonna make a good father some day, she thought wistfully. She wanted him to be Josh's father, selfishly, but she knew it would never happen. And as she thought that, she knew her defenses were crumbling. Before, when a thought like that had occurred, she would shun it, scolding herself for having such ideas. But now, six months later, she freely entertained the thoughts she had about JC. Although at times her revelations disheartened her, she was no longer scared to think.

Like the thoughts that were running through her mind as she saw him perform. How he would never give up his job, much less for her, made her heart ache. Oh, she knew that she would never want him to, but the basic fact that he was always away saddened her spirit, killing it almost to where she had to physically force herself to think of something else.

What was it about him that she loved so much? There were plenty of things that came to her mind, but his sense of commitment and responsibility overwhelmed her. He promised Josh he would return, that he would keep in touch, and he had. Not one thing did he do wrong in baby-sitting Josh, nothing. Halle could surely tell if he had, evident through Josh's actions. Suddenly Halle stopped herself.

Am I in love with him because of me, or am I in love with him because I want a father for Josh? This new revelation made a little more sense, especially seeing what happened during those six months... The question scared her, and either answer was deemed weak, shallow even, in her opinion. Were her feelings for him purely superficial? Panic swept through her, and she wasn't sure how to react.

For so long she hadn't needed a man in her life. If she felt that JC could be Josh's father, would he be offended? Would he be angry for Halle's reasoning? Or what about the other motive? Now that would be 100% superficial of her.

Finally Halle's logical side kicked in. Lighten up, girl. It sounded strikingly familiar, with plenty of resemblance to Kel's voice. So what if you like him 'cause of him? You deserve it. And come on, look at him playing with Josh like he were a kid again. You think he minds? 'Sides, the voice continued smugly, he doesn't even know how you feel about him. Everything Halle had tried to do was to set him off her scent so he never suspected...

"You are awfully quiet, Halle," JC commented, briefly glancing up at her from the coffee table they were playing at. She was startled. She hadn't even thought that the boys knew she came back already; she had been standing there so quietly.

"Just thinking," she answered, a blush coming to her face. If only he knew what she had been thinking. The thought made her even more embarrassed.

"Don't hurt yourself now," he teased, smiling from where he sat playing with Josh. Josh was attacking the momentarily motionless action figure in his hand.

"Hey!" Halle playfully threw a pillow at his head.

JC just laughed, returning to his play with Josh. What's so wrong with wanting that? she tried to reason with herself. Josh was happy, truly happy.

"What?" JC asked a few minutes later, looking up from his play with Josh and finding Halle staring at them with the oddest look on her face.

"Oh, I was just watching the two of you play," Halle brushed it off. Then she changed the subject, hoping to escape the topic before he could question her. "Are you staying for lunch?"

"Oh," JC exclaimed, as if recalling something. He glanced at his watch and began to stand up. "I would love to, but I can't."

"Oh," Halle said softly, trying to hide the disappointment in her voice. She may have been successful in that area, but her face clearly showed her emotions. She liked having JC around. She was happy when he was there, and her dismal thoughts never seemed to be such a big issue at those times.

"My parents are flying in from DC this afternoon," JC explained upon seeing the dismayed look on Halle's face. "I need to pick up a few things before they come, too."

"Ah," Halle said, glad for the enlightenment. "How long are they staying?"

"A few days," he replied. "I haven't seen them in a while, and it would be nice to spend a little time with them."

So she wouldn't have him to herself, er, she and Josh would have him to themselves. If he knew that they would be coming, why did he bother to beg her to prolong her stay? Then she hung her head in shame. It was his family, he needed to see them, too. All she could do was sit back and hope he wouldn't forget her and Josh and give them some time.

"Well tell them I said hi," Halle forced out a smile. She just wanted him to leave already. Her disappointment was becoming harder to hide.

"Why don't you come?" JC suggested as he arose from the floor.

"No, I wouldn't want to impose," said Halle quickly. Halle was shocked at his offer. "Besides, I have no one to watch Josh," she reasoned, making excuses.

"Really, it's OK," JC answered. "We'll bring Josh. I'm sure my parents would love to meet the both of you."

"No, I - "

"I would like it a lot if you came," he said forwardly. There. He had been blunt and concise about what he wanted. Now he had to wait for her reaction.

"Well..." Halle hesitated, pausing to think. She was shocked my JC's up-front manner, but she should've expected it, at least began to recognize it. She was getting this aura from him, something had changed. Maybe it was because they were on his home turf, but whatever it was, it was catching Halle off-guard. She couldn't decide whether she liked it or not.

"Can we please, Mommy?" Josh asked, tugging at her pant leg. She looked down at the little boy staring up at her. She saw the pleading look in his green eyes. What could she do? She immediately gave in; she couldn't resist Josh and she couldn't give into her own selfishness, not when Josh was involved. This vacation was also for Josh, and if Josh wanted to spend time with JC, then so be it. She wanted to give him what she could. If this was what he wanted, she could give this at least.

"Ok, then," Halle gave in.

"Yay!" the younger Josh exclaimed, jumping up and down. Meanwhile, the elder one just grinned from ear to ear, once again making Halle's knees feel like they were made of Jello.

"Come on, silly," Halle smiled, both of their enthusiasm rubbing off on her. "Go get your sneakers." Josh ran off into the bedroom to locate his shoes, both Halle and JC watching him run off.

"Josh, you know he dotes on you," Halle said quietly, directing her comment at JC, though not looking at him yet.

"I know," JC replied, noticing full well that she had addressed him as "Josh." It was the first time she had called him that since she arrived, the last time she did so was in New York. "I love him too." He turned to face Halle, only to find that she was already looking at him. There was a pained expression on her face and in her eyes.

"What's wrong, Hal?" he asked her, concerned. What was ailing her, causing her to look so sad and hurt? He didn't like to see her that way.

"It hurts me to see how sad he gets when you leave," Halle explained. She wanted to go on, tell him how much it hurt her, as well, to see him leave. She wanted to tell him how much he meant to her, but she knew that it was neither the time nor the place. She would not allow, clinging onto every single morsel of this 'strength' she was trying to hold onto. She didn't understand herself.

"I know it does," JC said apologetically, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Mommy!" Josh cried. "I can't find my shoes!"

Halle sighed and started for the room. JC's hand slid off her shoulder. A few minutes later, both Halle and Josh reemerged from the room.

"Ready?" JC asked them.

"Yeah!" Josh cried enthusiastically. Halle looked down at her appearance dismally. It would have to do though; she had nothing else to wear.

JC noted her concern. "Don't worry about how you look," he said. "You look great, and they won't even care about what you're wearing."

"Easy for you to say," Halle quipped. "Ever hear the expression, 'first impressions count?'"

"Don't worry about it," JC repeated, holding the door open. "I like how you look." Her look spoke of comfort to him. Just his comment made her heat beat a little faster, her eyes widen, and her legs momentarily stop. The boy had a way with words.

"Now come on," he said, smiling quietly, seeing her reaction. "Or else we're going to be late for their flight."

-*-*-*-

The airport was the airport, busy, always. Josh stood in between Halle and JC, each holding one of his hands. They stopped in front of a TV screen for what seemed like the 100th time since they had arrived, half an hour ago. "Where are they?" said JC worriedly. "They were supposed to have been in fifteen minutes ago!" Halle couldn't blame him for his worry. He was worried because on the TV screen it said that their flight, 590, was confirmed and scheduled to come in on time, but it was late. JC was getting frustrated.

Halle put a hand on his shoulders to stop him. "JC, stop. Getting worked up is not going to help anything. I'm sure they're fine, just a slight delay."

He sighed, liking her hand where it was. "I just wish I knew if you were right. I'm so worried."

She sighed too and leaned in closer to him. "I know you are." Suddenly, an idea flashed in her head. "Hold on. JC, could you watch Josh for a minute?"

JC nodded and she ran over to the terminal. By the gate stood a guard. She was about to ask him about the flight, but he disappeared into the gates before she could reach him. "Darn," she muttered. She turned to walk back to JC and Josh, but a figure crossed in front of her. "Excuse me," she said politely, wanting to get back.

"Ms. Lin," the voice replied.

"Jesus!" she exclaimed, turning to him. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, hello to you to Ms. Lin."

"Oops," she blushed. "Sorry. Hello, excuse my rudeness, I was just surprised, you know how that goes."

"I sure do," he said calmly. He looked different than he usually did, now that he was off duty for the little break, but yet, he was the same.

"I guess I should thank you for seeing the girls back safely."

This time he laughed, really laughed. "You are too gracious. I said I'd do it, and I did it. You don't need to thank me again."

She nodded slightly. "So you must be here for some reason..." she hinted.

"Oh, I came to see an old friend. You?"

"Well..." she hesitated. "I'm with JC."

He smiled. "I know."

She was flustered. "You did? How?"

He chuckled at her discomfort. He had known her reaction would be that. He knew all about her. Of course, he wasn't about to reveal all that he knew to her, she might become scared. He nodded his head over to where JC and Josh were waiting. "Isn't that your son I see over there with Mr. Chasez?"

Her blush was a sight to behold. He had known she would do that too. "Oh, umm, yea, it is."

He looked straight into her eyes. She felt like she knew him, she couldn't stop the gaze. He knew he had to interrupt her, his gaze was powerful. "Are you alright?" he asked her casually.

She blinked twice. "What, oh yes. Sorry, I must not be myself today. Excuse me, I think I must be..."

He silenced her with the wave of his hand. "You're confused, that's all."

"I'm confused?" she asked, her face scrunched with bewilderment.

Jesus nodded. "But you'll see and in time you'll understand."

"Understand what?"

"What to do. I have faith in you, all you need now is a little faith in yourself. I have an old saying, 'Faith is stronger than stone.' You just need to believe."

She didn't understand. "Jesus, I..."

His eyes darted to the corner of the room. "Isn't that who you wanted to speak with?"

She turned around quickly to see who Jesus was looking at. The guard she had been meaning to speak to had just reappeared. She turned quickly back to Jesus. "Yes, thank you it is, but how did you know I wanted to speak with.." Her voice trailed off. He wasn't there anymore. He'd just disappeared like that. But she thought she heard something, faintly in her head. I know everything. She shook her head and the voice disappeared. She left it at that. She was hearing things.

She looked into the crowd, looking for Jesus, but she couldn't catch even a glimpse. Her eyes landed on JC and Josh, still waiting for her. She didn't hesitate, she ran straight to the guard. "Excuse me, sir?" she asked politely.

"Yes, ma'am?" he answered.

She continued. "Has flight 590 arrived yet? The screen lists it as confirmed on time, but it's late."

"Not to worry, ma'am. I just went to check on it, they landed a few moments ago," he reassured her.

"Thank you!" she said, smiling brightly and then making her way over to JC and Josh. JC looked at her quizzically as she returned. She hadn't explained why she had asked him to watch Josh. "Your parents landed a few minutes ago..."

"Josh!"

All heads turned as the voices called. A couple was waving madly at them. Halle knew they could be none other then JC's parents. Her legs were frozen, she thought, though her stomach harbored butterflies. It was now or never.

Suddenly, Halle became very shy, her hands a bit clammy. JC had already turned and was jogging to his parents smiling figures. She bit her lip as she watched the happy scene. Too bad she felt she was on ice. Emotions surged through her, cascading at light speed: regret, nostalgia, fear- all coursed through her veins. She reached down and picked up Josh who was watching JC and his parents, though with somewhat of a different expression on his face. His eyes were curious, as he always was. "Are those Blue's Mommy and Daddy, Mommy?"

The innocent question hit Halle an acute pain in the gut and hurt her more than he knew. Every emotion was now magnified a million times and bore Halle a crushing blow. It was rare that the word "Daddy" was used by Josh, or her even. She never talked about it with him, but he knew what a "Daddy" was, she couldn't shield him from everything. She was scared to find out what else he knew.

And she remembered the "Daddy" who wasn't the Daddy at all, two of them. Raul first... strangely, she didn't hate him, like she had thought she would have if she ever saw him again. He had come back and she hadn't killed him. That was a feat extraordinaire itself. Instead, she had remained calm and detached, what she was best at doing. Maybe it had been for the better. What could Josh hope to gain from a father such as that? And maybe she would never have met the wonderful man she did... JC next... Now it was JC that filled that gap for Josh, or did it as well as he could. She... she couldn't ask for more, but she had to give a little.

"Halle! Josh!" Now it was their turn to have their names called out. She pulled out of her previous thoughts as though they burned her as she saw JC coming towards her with his mother an father on each shoulder. He certainly looked happy and she couldn't blame him. But she remembered batter days, when it would be her, not JC, on the arms of a mother and father... The worry returned as the scene came closer to her. She was anxious about them. What if they don't like me? she cringed at her thoughts. Why was it so important to her for them to like her? Deep down, she knew.

Finally, he reached Halle and Josh. Both Halle and Josh looked demurely into faces that slightly resembled JC. He looks like his father, she noted as she brought Josh closer to her and he held on to her neck. JC though, didn't seem to notice their shyness, or at least, didn't let on that he did. He stood there grinning widely as if nothing could be more perfect.

"Halle, Josh, these are my parents, Karen and Roy Chasez. Mom, Dad, this Halle Lin and her son Josh," he said as he introduced them. Halle was unprepared of what to say next. Silently inside she was cursing herself. Yes, this is what you want their first impression of you to be! Silence! Idiot! But she was even more unprepared when Mrs. Chasez made the first move.

Karen Chasez closed off the distance between her and Halle by enveloping her in a hug. "It's so nice to finally meet the Halle that I've been hearing so many wonderful things about." From where Halle was, she could see a red blush flush over JC's face guiltily as his mother said that. It felt strange to Halle, to have this woman's arms around her. It had been so long since she felt her own mother's arms... Halle hugged her back.

"It's nice to meet you too, Mrs. Chasez. I'm..." Halle's brain went black and she was cursing herself again.

But Karen only laughed. "Nervous? Don't be. I'm just me and you're just you and they look like very good people to be. Now let me hug that son of yours!"

Karen took Josh into her own arms. Halle wasn't surprised to hear her call him "little man". It seemed a term of endearment within the family that had been passed down to JC. Roy came forward and gave her a peck on the cheek, along with his hug. Halle blushed fiercely at that.

"As my wife said, so nice to finally meet the Halle." But Roy was looking at JC now as he blushed again. He laughed heartily. "Are we embarrassing you, son?" He didn't even need an answer as JC blushed even harder. "Good."

Halle smiled at that.

"Come over here, JC," Roy called him, putting his arm around Halle's shoulders. JC moved over to stand in front of the both of them.

"Yea, Dad?" he asked as he came over. Mr. Chasez instead swung them both around on either arm.

"Are the things JC tells me about you as wonderful as he makes them out to be?" he asked, directing the question at Halle.

They both couldn't stop the blush as they looked at each other. Roy laughed once again. "I see," he said, with a smile on his face. "Now I'm going to go catch up to your mother." Without another word, he walked away from them towards Mrs. Chasez, leaving them alone.

JC and Halle were still blushing as they looked at each other. JC cleared his throat. "Umm, excuse my father, Halle."

Halle laughed. "You know? I kinda liked him." JC just stood there with his mouth agape. Halle just laughed and went to catch up with his parents and her son. As they made their way to the luggage claim, there was nothing JC could do, but follow.

-*-*-*-

They had insisted Halle take the front seat, beside JC, while they sat in the back, Karen holding Josh in her lap. Halle, of course, had protested, but they had insisted and a 22-year-old was no match for 50-year old woman and a 53-year-old man, let alone the fact that they were JC's parents. So she sat up front, with JC. Things were silent, except for Karen and Roy playing with Josh and the occasional squeal or laughter.

"Halle," said Karen. "It's so good to have a child to play with again. All my babies are grown up now. They don't want to play." Halle realized that she meant Josh and smiled awkwardly at her. She had been silently watching them through the rearview mirror, her heart bursting to see them with her son. It made her happy and it made her sad in all the same instance. She could never have hoped for a better reaction.

"Halle," started Roy. "I didn't know you were going to be here when we came."

"Well, it was sort of last minute, Mr. Chasez. But Josh and I need a vacation, and what better place to take it than Orlando?"

"City of magic," Mr. Chasez grinned. "Are you going to take him to Disney World?"

Josh's ears perked up at the words, "Disney World." Halle laughed. "I was planning to."

Roy looked at his wife. "What do you say we go with them, Karen? It's our vacation too."

Karen smiled as she continued to play with Josh. "You don't need to ask me twice. I think it sounds like a wonderful idea."

"Well then it's settled," said Roy. "Unless, of course, you mind Halle."

Quickly, she shook her head. "No, no, not at all. I'd be very glad if you all came."

Roy laughed. "Good. Oh Halle, you don't mind if we bring another guest, do you?"

"Oh, no," she said, "It'll be fine," but she wondered who they could want to bring along.

"Even better," said Roy. "Now let's see if our son is excited as yours to go. JC?" he asked. As if he even had to. Roy knew the answer.

JC blushed at his father asking him to go, but managed to get out, "I would love to."

And that was that.

-*-*-*-

JC, Halle and Josh waited in a spacious lobby, sitting on plush red chairs, as Mr. and Mrs. Chasez checked into their room. JC had wanted them to stay at Justin's with him, but they had declined. They had stressed that it was their vacation and as much as they wanted to see JC, they wanted to be alone too. So it was settled and here they were, at the Hyatt, waiting in silence. Mr. and Mrs. Chasez came back smiling. A porter was behind them, lugging around their multitude of luggage.

"Going up," said Karen as they all got up and stepped in the elevator. "Floor 10," she said. Silently, up the elevator went, stopping at floor ten. They all got off and went straight to Karen and Roy's room.

It was spacious, to say the least, a huge suite, just for them. "Oh, honey," she said to Roy as the porter laid all their luggage at the door and excused himself after being tipped. "There something I want to unpack right now."

She went over to the one of the luggage cases and carefully unzipped. "I don't want it to get crushed," she said as she reached inside to take out the garment. Out she pulled a full length gown wrapped in plastic.

Halle's breath caught when she saw it. Karen saw this and smiled at her. "Do you like it, Halle?"

She nodded. "It's beautiful, Mrs. Chasez. You must be planning to go somewhere fancy."

Karen laughed. "Just one of JC's functions that he's been invited to. It's just slightly formal, so he asked us to bring along some dressy things."

"Oh," said Halle quickly, looking down before regaining the confidence to look up. "Well, have a good time. I really should be going now. It's getting late and I..."

"Halle." She was cut off by JC. She turned to the sound of her name. He stood quietly, right in front of the lamp, casting a dramatic shadow on him.

She just looked up at JC, saying not a word. They hadn't said much to each other in the presence of his parents.

He cleared his throat, nervous, "Would you like to go with me to a little party that Transcon is having?" He voice was a little low and hoarser than it should be, attesting to his nervousness.

How could she possibly say no? She cleared her throat, searching his steady eyes for just a moment. "Yes, I'd love to," she replied shyly, after she had seen all that she wanted to.

All was silent... until Karen broke it, laughing with a twinkle in her eye that Halle didn't know whether it was from the light or it was all her own. "Well, it's about time, Josh. I was going to ask her if you didn't."

He blushed, but Karen just smiled at him. She knew what she was doing and she was thoroughly enjoying it.

Halle cleared her throat, looking up. "Well, Mr. and Mrs. Chasez. I really must be going now. It was nice to meet you both." Halle was a gracious as she could be. She wanted to leave before she overstayed her welcome.

They nodded at her as she went to gather up Josh from where Roy was playing with him.

"Halle, dear," asked Mrs. Chasez. "Where are you staying?"

"Oh, the Marriott, I..." Her voice trailed off as she realized that she had only been checked up for this morning. Starbucks had reserved the rooms for only two days until they left that morning. But Halle hadn't left... "Oh my God! I've got to get to the hotel!" Her mind was in a furry.

"Whoa! Whoa! Slow down Halle," calmed JC, seeing her panic and stepping towards her. "What's wrong?"

"JC, I was only checked in till this morning. I'm not reserved for tomorrow. That means..."

JC didn't need for anything else to be said, neither did Roy and Karen. They all understood now. Neither Halle or JC knew what to do about this dilemma. But Karen wasn't so daft.

"Why don't you stay here, Halle?" she suggested, in front of the closet where she was hanging up the blue dress. She turned around quickly after she was done. "I'm sure they have some vacant rooms. You could go talk to the front desk and reserve one."

Halle chewed her lips and thought it over. What else could she do? She had no where else to go. She looked up slowly. "I might have to do that, but I need to get my stuff from the Marriott. I don't know what they've done with it." Worry was in her eyes, it was too much to deal with, but she sought to find a way, she always did. "Ok," she said, talking more to herself, than anyone in the room. "I'll go to the front desk and reserve the room." She rambled on. "I hope the line isn't too long, and then I'll call a cab and run over to the Marriott and get my stuff..."

JC could see she wasn't in the right mind. She was talking to herself at the speed of lightning, trying to make plans when she knew very well it was too much for just one person to handle. She was turning into a nervous wreck "Stop, Halle," he said, grabbing her shoulders forcefully.

She looked up at him, with wide eyes, startled that he had done that.

"You can't do it all by yourself. Stop trying." He looked deep into her eyes as he said that.

"Then what do I do?" she asked calmly, looking right back at him.

He ran a hand through his hair, looking around the room as he did so. "Ok, I'll tell you what. Mom, Dad, could you go reserve a room for Halle?" As they nodded, he looked back over at Halle. "Halle, you and I will go over to the Marriott and get your stuff. Josh will..." He looked over at his parents once again as he found a solution. "Mom, Dad, would you be willing to look after Josh for us while we go over and get Halle's stuff? "It'd be easier if he stayed here..."

But Roy stopped him. "Say no more. Consider it done."

"Yes," said Karen. "Ok, you kids get going," she said, pushing Halle and JC both out the door of their suite. "Josh will be safe with us."

"Are you sure?" interrupted Halle, worried. She didn't want to impose like this on them. She had just met them, for pete's sake!

"My dear," said Karen. "I am very sure. Your son will be very safe. I have three of my own. Now, run along. You have to get your things before something happens to them!"

Halle was listening to the voice of reason and without anymore hesitation, she ran over to Josh. "Honey," she said, holding his little hands. "Mommy's going to go over to the hotel with Blue. Where going to be staying here from now on. Will you stay here with Mr. and Mrs. Chasez and be a good boy for Mommy?"

He nodded slightly. "I promise, Mommy."

She nodded, satisfied with his answer. She heard JC come up behind her after he had grabbed his keys, ready to go. She saw him kneel in front of Josh. "Hey," he said to Josh. "We're just going over to get your stuff. We'll be back soon, ok?"

He nodded his head and JC mussed his hair. "Alright, little man, be good. Come on, Halle," he said, beckoning her to leave as he stood there.

She nodded and turned back to Josh one last time. "I love you, Josh."

"I love you too, Mommy," he said as he leaned in and hugged her, his little body pressed against hers in a fierce hug. He loved his mother. For a long time, she had been all he had. Now it was different. He looked at up at JC after Halle let him go.

JC smiled down at him, as if knowing what he was going to ask. "Hey, I love you too," he said. Josh ran to him and hugged his leg. JC leaned down and picked him up, hugging him tight. "We'll be back soon."

Karen came up behind them silently and took Josh from JC's arms. "Come on, little guy. You two go on now. We'll be alright here. We have work to do."

Halle nodded and walked to the door, JC on her heels. She looked a little lost. JC attributed to that to the dilemma ahead of them. He was wrong though. It was him she was caught on. She just couldn't get her mind off Josh... with JC, and how it warmed her heart to see them together and even more how it broke to see them apart.

-*-*-*-